All about love on Valentine’s week
It’s the week of love.
If there’s a week that we think about marriage and relationships, Valentine’s week is probably it. Am I wrong in putting us all in one of these four categories?
- you’re single and happy
- you’re single and unhappy
- you’re married and happy
- you’re married and unhappy
This week is a good time to talk about love and relationships because we’ve all got some expectations about receiving love, so the conversation applies to everyone. Happiness, honestly, is largely dependent upon you and your frame of mind.
The best kind of love
C.S. Lewis defines four kinds of love in his profound book, The Four Loves. He wrote it while he was still single, and he had never fallen in love. His chapter on philia love–love between friends–contains some of the keenest perceptions about strong love that apply to both singles and married. All of our deep love relationships with family and friends depends on strong philia love. We must like one another, enjoy one another, and uplift one another. Our love must be reciprocal, honest, and resilient under strain. It occurs when we see and are seen by another human.
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'”–C.S. Lewis
Great marriages and great lifelong friendships have a foundation of philia love. I will do anything for you, and you will do anything for me. We are safe with each other. We have a covenant and commitment to protect and support; we do not operate from a contract mindset (as long as you support me, I’ll support you).
“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”–C.S. lewis
Next week is National Marriage Week (Feb. 7-14), and Sunday is World Marriage Day (Feb. 15). In honor of this week, and in hopes of helping you wherever you are on your love/unmarried/married journey, I’m providing links below to articles and blogs I’ve published about the topic. I hope you’ll find something helpful. Please email me if I can expound, explain, or support you in any way.
Marriage mentors could be just what your marriage is missing
Ten statements that will change your marriage
Three reasons you can’t affair-proof your marriage
Ten statements that will change your marriage for better or worse (similar to previous one)
Why compromise is not the secret to a great marriage–this is
How to know if God wants you to marry someone
How to be your husband’s best friend without losing your identity
Thirty days to a better marriage
A Valentine’s Day prayer about love
How to love: a paraphrase and a prayer
Happy Valentine’s Week!
Never forget that God calls you his Bride, his Beloved, his Wife, his Son or Daughter, his Friend, his Lover.
And if you want to teach God’s love to your children, here’s a great resource:
