Why doing the right thing never gets old
Words of wisdom for graduating from any kind of life season.
Of all the mantras that can guide you throughout your life and apply to literally every situation, it’s DO THE RIGHT THING.
I’ve been in a season where this response has proven, once again, to be wise and true. I was thinking of it just this morning during my quiet time and my (embarrassed to say) scrolling time. As I observed the culture at large and my close families and friends’ posts, I thought of this mantra: Do the right thing.
That would solve everything. If all of us always chose to do the right thing, none of the problems in society or in our relationships would exist. We would literally be living in our own Garden of Eden.
But then, the first two humans made a poor choice in Eden, anyway. So I guess we’re cursed with both the choice and the predestination to choose poorly.
But we do have a choice. That’s the blessing.
“The time is always right to do what is right.”–Dr. Martin luther king, jr.
When we were children, right and wrong were pretty straightforward. Don’t hit; be kind. Don’t lie; tell the truth. Don’t be lazy; do your work. We ingested a paradigm (even a promise) that if you did good things, good things would happen to you. The choices we faced in life seemed like they’d be good guy/bad guy decisions.
The hero always wins in the end.
Maybe that’s why I was always drawn to stories and storytelling. Everyone’s the hero of their own stories.
But life doesn’t usually unfold like that.
Somewhere in early adulthood, we arrived at the realization that most of life’s decisions are choosing between good and better, or even harder choices like expediency versus foresight. Or logic and strategy versus wisdom and faith.
We usually find ourselves in impossible gray areas where friends betray trust or business partners steal credit and opportunity. We have to make unanticipated decisions over parental care. We navigate disease, grief, despair, depression, heartbreak, addictions, marital breakups, financial collapse–all the real-life experiences we knew would happen but we thought they’d never happen to us.
Where is the clear right and wrong choice when the sky falls? Where is justice then?
“integrity is doing what is right, even when nobody is watching.”–c.s. lewis
Perhaps you’re making these kinds of decisions in a gray world:
- You parent with intentionality, authority, and love in a culture that says your children should set the rules they want to live by.
- You work with people you can’t trust without resorting to their methods of manipulation and control.
- You chose to speak the complete truth, even if it makes you look weak, rather than adjust the narrative or spread innuendo to make yourself look better.
- You are generous, even when you’re actually lacking wealth. You develop an abundance mindset, rather than a competition or a reputation mindset.
- You base your values on absolutes in a society that absolutely ridicules truth while it follows its own convenient “truth.”
- You set honest, loving perimeters with adult children, parents, and family members, instead of adjusting the family dynamics and pretending that dysfunction doesn’t exist.
- You remove yourself from emotionally and spiritually abusive scenarios without expecting the abuser to repent of his/her behavior.
- You contribute positively to local charities and organizations rather than spending your time accusing civic and social organizations of ruining the world.
Instead of pointing fingers, you fix yourself. You get healthy physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. You do the hard work so you have the strength to do the right thing.
You Do right, even when the right thing is not happening to you.
That’s the decision we all must make. Every moment of Every day.
It’s not possible to always get this process right. It’s a process, after all. A transformation evolves over time, turning one thing into a completely different thing–a metamorphosis. Wisdom comes through catalytic crossroads and gradual transfiguration. This is the human mutation we were all created to experience.
Making righteous, moral choices is personal justice. It’s nobody’s responsibility but mine. No place in the world can ever be good if its citizens are not in the transformation of becoming godly people. It turns out that doing right is always the hard thing to do, even in a climate where “righteousness” is uplifted. That’s why there’s so much hurt and hypocrisy in religious institutions. We think life should be easier there, but the same people who live in the world, live under steeples. We all carry our sins everywhere we go.
All of us are wired to save ourselves, defend ourselves, and worship ourselves. Our beauty, intellect, and talent have been idolized and promoted since we were babies. Everything in society–school, sports, the arts, government, religion–is built around celebrating beauty, intellect, and talent. The desired outcome is always fame (ie. worship). And there you have the human predicament. We must save ourselves because we have elevated ourselves to savior status, and we can’t consistently get the job done right.
This is why the world is dis-regulated, chaotic, unhappy, selfish, and downright evil. Not because some people are bad and some people are good. The truth is–some people are choosing to do the right things, and other people are not.
Kids, parents, singles, grandparents–this is your graduation message. Do the right thing every time you have a choice.
You will find that over time, you will graduate from one season of struggle into another season of struggle, but you will have done the preparation needed to keep moving on, to keep growing in goodness and kindness and impact. Doing the right thing never gets old.
